Supporting Families across Generations

When you think about your family, who do you think of? Typically we think of our own immediate families, parents and children right? Now days people are living longer and families are taking care of grandparents or other elderly family members. In the 1900s the average life expectancy was 49 years old, today its 77. Wow, thats a big difference.

In my family all of my parents have passed away, 2 of the four of them lived into their 80's and the other two died early one in a car accident and one of heart problems however, I fully believe that had those things not contributed to their death, they would have lived long lives. My dad is in his 70s and you would never know it he still runs daily and is very healthy and active. His older sister is almost 90 and although she has come health problems, she lives by herself and does what she can on her own.

When I think about supporting my family I think of this Aunt. She has macular degeneration and can't see which means she can't drive, she can't really write although she tries, she can't see to cook yes, she tries. Think of all the things you do and how they would change if you couldn't see. My dad and step-mom, my sisters, and even my mom although my parents divorced many many years ago are all the people she count's on for support. They take her to get her hair done, grocery shopping, church, pick her up for any family occasion etc. She has to have constant help, she couldn't to it without them and quite honestly they couldn't do it without each other. It's a hard job and probably even harder on the supporters than it is on her. My dad and step-mom want to go on a mission and if they are going to, they need to do it soon before my dad gets much older but they are afraid to leave because my dad is the only immediate family member my aunt has left and my dad feels responsible for her even though my sisters have said they will take care of her. It's been really hard situation.

In the book Successful Marriage and Families is says "there comes time when the health of aging parents fails and they are no longer able to care for themselves. The unfortunate reality is that increased years of life expectancy have been accompanied by longer periods of disability and there is an increasing need to care for the elderly." My aunt, besides her eyes, is totally healthy so I see this quote as something that for use is reality.

Leaders of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints which I am a member of had told us that families have a responsibility to care for their older family members. That it is important that families work together and support each other. It is hard but it brings great blessings.

I feel bad that I don't live at home and I am not able to help with my Aunt. I often think about my parents aging and now in their 70s what the next few years are going to bring. I feel sad and guilty that I'm not home and able to help. That it will be up to my sisters to take care of my mom as her husband has passed away and she is on her own. I feel guilty that I'm not there to help with my Aunt and that my dad and sisters are doing so much work to help her but I know they are ok about doing it and it's done through love. What an amazing family I have to give of themselves.


Hawkins, A., Dollahite, D., & Draper, T. (2012). Successful marriages and families. Provo, Utah: BYU Studies and School of Family Life, Brigham Young University.

Comments

Popular Posts